Reality TV - Part I (Roadies)

Now, since the IPL concluded, poor remote control is going to be in lot of pain again. The idiot box kept in my room has nothing sensible to offer now. Browsing through channels, even a blind man can recognize that there is absolute homogeneity of nonsense being broadcasted on each and every channel. Topping the list is the so called Reality TV. Salute to channels and directors of such series who have fooled Indian crowd like anything. Is the Indian crowd really so dumb or the dumbest in the world?

MTV Roadies 5.0, about which the ‘youngistan’ is so mad, is one extremely made up and fakest show ever possible on this earth. If I hurt your roadie emotions then please don't read further else you might loose control and end up in jail after shooting me out of rage.

Firstly, the aired interviews were fabricated with comical situations and nonsense answers from the contestants later humiliated by interviewers for the same just to create hype about the season. That too because we (the young generation) go gaga when someone's ass get kicked by the baldhead Raghu. Though, there is some sense in the guy for sure because he satirically and very nicely mocks our young generation and the hedonism associated with us. I mean how come when the question was "What do you want to do in your life?" Everybody in different cities at different time answered the same that they want to become something which they don't know. Were they coincidences?

Secondly, during certain vote out sessions, Ranvijay used to warn that if you do this, that will happen, a tie will happen etc. Slapping Probability in its face exactly same thing used to happen. Remember during Snehashish's elimination, the mastermind Raghu was already there, ridiculing Snehashish. Why? Simply because Snehashish's departure was pre-decided humiliating Probability and Random processes again on prime time television. But that was not enough, when the voted out dumb blokes and girls came back to challenge the remaining ones (Anmol v/s Prab, Sneha v/s Ashu etc), if you might have looked slightly taking your eyes away from Anmol's figure or Shambahvi's low neck, you must have seen that the tasks were clearly advantageous to the candidates who later won. Not even after seven lives, corpulent Snehashish with absurd faux passé hairstyle can hang from the water pipe for longer duration than relatively slimmer Ashutosh. Same holds for Shambhavi v/s Ankita (She and her protruding lips worst ever onscreen) or for Prabjhot v/s Anmol (Attitude - 8.5/10, Aptitude - 2/10 but I liked Anmol, too bad she have a bf).

Coming to Shambhavi, she literally gave away everything, sacrificed her dignity, bitched, sleazy acts (atleast verbally) justifying them as her strategy. Poor and obtusest girl don't know that it was MTV's strategy [;)]. Ayaz, irritating lad from Calcutta was shown the door because he was not medically fit after the accident. To conceal this change in the script, a vote out session was thrown out. Even a roulette table looked so predictable on the show.

Lastly, the finale was most comical, so called last challenges for clinching the over rated roadie trophy were getting naked, going bald, getting pierced and slapped (!!!), not the contestants but their forced team members which readily agreed under the Roadie tag. What a cliché? The only best part was Shambhavi getting one tight slap (MTV style) by Ashutosh. Why because she called him a brother and still flirted properly with everyone except brother’s friend Nihal, perfect Bollywood situation. Infact, the roadies except the finalists were made to do sillier and less adventurous tasks simply because they were brought to KL, Malaysia by MTV. But, Ranvijay credited Nihal’s and Ashu's fabulous PR skills. Do they really have any? The emotional session which was stuffed between the melodrama due to Sony Ericsson and Airtel definitely deserved accolades for catering the sponsors.

But every limit of melodrama was finally breached when Sonel (lol lol lol) decided the winner of MTV Roadies 5.0, the game goes international. However just after her vote out, she said she would have voted out Ashutosh if she had the immunity then why on earth she screwed Nihal with such a broad smile on her face? It was just because the winner was predetermined from the start and then like a sliced pizza the melodrama was served episode by episode on your television. Infact, the tie in the last show was absolutely certain then what was the point of having the tasks? C'mon just to get Shambhavi slapped [;)], simple. My ten dollars on Ashutosh being MTV’s unit person too!

Finally coming to the roadie’s spirit, just recite words like F***, D***, beep, beep, beep etc and their Hindi translations like nursery rhymes and BAM! You are a Roadie. Yeah, yeah yeah F*** you I am a roadie. Now on finding young generation so faltoo & vella, MTV have started roadie awards and something on Orkut is coming up as well. Join it because it is your life screw it up the way you want but don’t criticize females of your house for hooking upon saas-bahu because enjoying the plotting and bitching of roadies you are no different. I used to love MTV but now less music and more Ekta Kapoor it is becoming in a subtle way. Splitsvilla is another degrading stuff coming up. Reality TV! ENJOY!