Snowfall

In this weather of cold breeze and soft snow
On the bench I am sitting all alone
And as the night will get old
Desires for your companionship will grow many fold
Amidst this chilly atmosphere
I am missing you, your warmth my dear
Your touch, your lips, your amazing flavor
the feeling of yours being my next door neighbor
Walking barefoot here, doesn't give me enough shiver
which can match, wot we had when our bodies were near
The bonfire further drowning me into your thoughts
How reasons to get into each other we sought
I don't know, If you will read and find it nice
But a mere thought about me in your mind will suffice
As now on seeing me, you may disgust or frown
But there is an unique satisfaction of atleast having you around


For you,
From yours
Vicks

Statement of Purpose

I am supposed to provide an answer to a question which
was not that much difficult when I was 6 years old.
Oops ! I forgot to mention the question.Sorry, the question
is

What are my future goals?

Honestly, at 6 it was very easy because I wanted to become
Superman. But as my birthdays passed away and the numbers
on the std. section of stickers on my notebooks changed, so did
my goals. Then came 9th and it wasn't that difficult then either
though there were some social obstacles against it.

Well I wanted to be the life partner of someone who now have
a life partner. No, child marriages are not that much prevalent
anymore in India. But it was just that she was 2 years senior to
me. And out of these she failed once, so you can see there is
not any abnormality in this relationship and also age of women
aren't that simple to decipher. I was really firm on my decision to
hold her hands till doomsday but then her bugaboo kinda brothers
compelled me to make some changes in my plans.

Like a brave man, I then moved on.I then cleared boards(CBSE
man and not any south indian board ;)) surprisingly with great
marks. Before I can choose a stream,I was told about the coaching,
tuitions centers for physics, maths and blah blah.Oh! I was confused
because all of the hot and rich chicks of my school opts for commerce
and someone was really into my head and in my @$@!!$@! as well.

Jesus, I am imagining her again. Stop it....stop it You have to
write a report on this paper.I was glad somebody knocked then.

Anyways lets get back to my vacillating state of mind. I was then
attending the science section classes and looked how guys and girls
(don't be surprised, many of them were not good looking) were
shooting problems of physics, stoichiometry at each other. My aunt
later introduced me to the world of IIT preparation. I managed
to get citizenship of one of the institutes just after school for an
year. I never knew what I wanted but people around me were sure
what they wanted from me, admission to an engineering institute.
However, none of them knew what these institutes are from inside.
It all lies in the vicious circle of Indian society which don't even
spare school kids anymore to become nothing more than simple
hedonists.

So my goal became clearing IIT JEE or any other entrance
examination and by god's grace and guidance of 3 really psycho
freaks, I managed to reach this weird place which was not even
the slightest of the college I saw in "Ishq vishq" or any other
college movie.It was , it is and it will be different. Please
understand this if any aspirant is reading it though
chances are rare because I am not that popular for
academics or on blogspot.com as I just kill people in
my writings.

Three years passed and been through crests and rough
patches. Definitions of many things in life has changed.I learned
how to smile when I see someone with something which was once
mine.How people change colors even at a faster rate than
chameleons.One idiot once said to me there is a difference of
level between us two. He never realized that even if he stands on
a stool, he will still look shorter than me. But again then it was not
his fault, we tend to think we are smart, sexy and cool when a
female is around even if we are bald , fat, not knowing languages
like Tamil or belonging to design department etc.

Secrets, commitments, promises, loyalty I have seen them going
down with the integrity of humans around who then took crash
courses of alcohol and fags to rise above all these insecurities and
stupidities. But then even that so called feeling of Nirvana is like a
double edged sword, freeing you from these worldly concerns but
also making you confess your dark secrets in public which are later
laughed about.

Thus, I can conclude there is some level of increment in my
understanding of the world and on the account of so many
experiences I present my purpose to live and achieve my dream
whatever it is on this planet before my demise because I don't like
the idea of getting a noble prize after transforming into ashes.